Since one of the reasons for this blog is to preserve memories our family memories, I thought I would write the story of Bruce and I. Also, I have been inspired by my friend Paula, who is telling she and her husband Bryan's story.
Bruce and I met in March of 2003 just after my 36 th birthday. However, the story really doesn't start there. I'll start in 2002. I was 35 years old and had been working as a teacher of preschool children with special needs for about 6 years. I was in adoration one day speaking with Jesus about my life as I often did. This particular conversation went something like this: "Jesus, again I come to ask you what it is your plan for my life. I feel like you are calling me to be a wife and mother, but you haven't brought the right man into my life. It's time. I'm 35 years old. I don't want to be an old maid teacher. Where is my St. Joseph you have chosen for me. Send him to me. It really is time."
You see, after a very rebellious and empty time in my early twenties that was surrounded by drugs and alcohol, Jesus save me in August of 1994. I fell in love with Jesus and developed a new love for my Catholic Faith. I surrounded myself with faithful people and read everything I could about Jesus and the Saints, attended every conference and retreat I could. At some point, God gave me the grace to know that the person I was, was not the person HE created me to be, but that I was wounded. I embarked on an adventure to become "whole".
Around August of 1995, during a break at a retreat I was attending, I was speaking with an older (wiser) woman about many things. Among them that I felt like I was called to be a wife and mother. She told me to ask God to choose my husband for me, since he knew me best, and to ask God for a sign so I would know the man God chose for me. I was not to tell anyone, not even my best friend, what the sign was. Well, I did what she said and began praying for the man God chose for me. Little did I know that I would be praying for the next 8 years. It wasn't 8 years of desperate praying. It would ebb and flow and at times the prayer was desperate, but mostly just lifting up prayers here and there, always wondering if any new guys that entered my life were THE ONE. At some point, I started praying novenas to St. Joseph, asking him to help find this man and send him my way.
OK, back to 2002. I left adoration and went home. My dear friend Shannon called me the very next day. She was VERY excited to tell me about a program she saw on EWTN the night before. It was Abundant Life and the guest speaker had just started a website called Ave Maria Singles. It was a website for Catholics to meet other Catholics. (YES, we met Online, Can you believe?) Well, you can imagine my reaction, "I am NOT going on some website to meet a guy." It seemed a little desperate to me, at the time. She talked me into coming over to her house so that we could check it out together. It certainly wasn't your run-of-the mill pick up site. The questions were mostly essay questions involving issues of faith like "How do you feel about the Eucharist?", "Mary", "the Magestarium of the Church", things like this. Well, I joined and over the next YEAR I corresponded with many, many, many, many men (perhaps 60 or so). It was actually fun and exciting. I graduated to the phone conversation stage with 4 of those men and actually met and had a short relationship with one.
After the relationship ended, I had at this point pretty much figured that I needed a shake up in my life. I was attending a retreat based on the Spiritual Excercises of St. Ignatius and decided that I wanted to sell everything I had and become a missionary. I scheduled a discernment weekend with Big Woods mission and began to give my life's belongings away. I had told my landlord that I was moving out and was going to finish my school year living at my sister's house so that I could pay off some debt before going into the mission field. In the midst of boxes and distributing my belongings, I checked Ave Maria Singles. Why?, I'm not sure. Anyway, there was a message from Bruce. It was a nice message, but of course, I replied "you seem like a very nice guy, but now is not a good time. I am quiting Ave Maria Singles and becoming a missionary. Thank you. Good bye"
He wrote back with a very long letter, telling about his family and I don't really remember what else, but at the end he asked me for my phone number. Although I don't really remember the contents of the letter, I remember it was sweet and it touched me. I gave him my sister's phone number. He called me and I remember his voice was so gentle and peaceful. It was very calming to me. The conversations came so easily and natural. There were never any awkward silences. After a few weeks we were having 3,4,5 hour conversations into the night. There probably wasn't a topic we didn't discuss in those first few weeks. I started really looking forward to those conversations. Of course, I had the discernment weekend scheduled and I was going to meet the Bishop of The Grenadines, where I was to go on mission.
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